Suggestion For A New Statutory Holiday

Canada currently recognizes nine federal statutory holidays (PDF) and one civic holiday.  Various jurisdictions have slight differences, either in the name of existing holidays (Canada Day is apparently called Memorial Day in Newfoundland, Victoria Day is Dollard Day in Quebec) or by having unique holidays of their own (Family Day in Alberta in February, St. Jean Baptiste Day in Quebec in June.)

The ten (eleven if you get both Good Friday and Easter Monday as many places do) official holidays in Canada are:
January – New Year's Day
March/April – Good Friday (and/or Easter Monday)
May – Victoria Day
July – Canada Day
August – (Civic Holiday only in most of Canada)
September – Labour Day
October – Thanksgiving
November – Remembrance Day
December – Christmas Day
December – Boxing Day

I know there are a ton of economic issues involved so this is unlikely to ever happen but I always thought that we needed at least one or two more statutory holidays to make it an even dozen and to match the number of months (even if every month doesn't necessarily get a stat.)

The biggest gap is that long stretch between the hangover of January 1 to the redemption of Good Friday/Easter Monday in March or April.  There's a reason why February has the highest suicide rate of any month and it's not just Christmas credit card debt.  I think that having a statutory holiday in February would go a long way to improving the situation.  Alberta's on the right track with their “Family Day” which is nondenominational, noncontroversial (oh, I'm sure some would protest) and something most people have, whether it be parents, siblings, cousins, siblings or whatever.  So why not simply expand this to the rest of the country?

My other idea for a new statutory holiday is a bit stranger.  Part of the reason it's so hard to implement a new holiday is the fear the business community and government have of another day where the vast majority of citizens are at home and therefore, not working and driving the economy.  I agree – we all have enough holidays together.  So why not have a rotating statutory holiday that depends on something else that's fairly important to everyone, no matter your religion or ethnic background or location in the country?  Why not make it official that your birthday is a statutory holiday?  The benefits are enormous – instead of being obligated to eat turkey or go to church, you get a day just for yourself to do whatever you want or need to do, with no obligations to family or friends, god or government. 

What if your birthday falls on a day that you're not scheduled to work?  As with other stats, you would get a day off near it in lieu.  What if you are born on a stat?  Bonus round – you get to pick any day of the year that you want to be your own personal stat holiday for the rest of your life (no changing though – the federal government might even have to start a registry!)  The name of this magic new holiday?  YouDay.  Unlike Saddam's eldest son, this YouDay would be a time for peaceful reflection, joyous celebration or any other activity you wish to engage in. 

When I am elected Prime Minister of Canada (and then declare myself “Grand Ruler for Life”) this will be my first decree change.  Helping Peter Goldring realise his dream will be my second.

On a completely unrelated topic, isn't 33 a wonderful number?  

Comments 5

  1. Anonymous wrote:

    Perhaps I misread your post, but Labour Day is *not* Saskatchewan day in Saskatchewan. Saskatchewan Day is in August and Labour Day is in September. I don't think all the pinko socialists in your home province would go for renaming Labour Day and switching it all around all willy-nilly.
    I think we should have a statutory holiday that's *like* YouDay, except it will be the annual celebration of everyone's birthday. Or un-birthday as the case may be. 'Cause then we'd get cake. And the Federal government would have to bake it for us. Of course, then they'd eat most of it anyway and it probably wouldn't taste very good because they'd use a bunch of ingredients from other countries, and we would have to apply for our cake using a 20 page form, and provide a 150 final report about how wonderful the cake was and how many people got to eat it and how they all benefitted from it in the long run, even though nobody really *did* like it but they were too polite to say…and most of them didn't get any because of the federal clawback. And the final report would be due before we received the cake which, as I mentioned before, would arrive sometime in July for a statutory holiday in February.
    And then you'd get charged GST for the cake, so you'd end up paying for your *own* cake, really, even though a year from Unbirthday Day, you'd receive half of it back, but by then it'd be all moldy and disgusting with bits of hair and possibly cheese in it. And God only knows who the feds would actually get to *bake* the thing. Probably some kind of marketing firm. They'd all have really nice *pictures* of cake, but the actual product would taste like ground up golf balls.
    Anyway, good idea, though.

    Posted 19 Jul 2006 at 4:55 am
  2. Anonymous wrote:

    Hey there,
    Thanks for catching that. I guess that's what I get for trying to whip off a post right before midnight to keep my “consecutive days with posts” streak alive while also trying to finish off an assignment due at 10am tomorrow.
    So what else is new? Did the SPG move? How's Brenda? Are DCH follow-up reports due (I'm guessing they are based on that cake monologue you wrote.)

    Posted 19 Jul 2006 at 6:29 am
  3. Anonymous wrote:

    Happy Birthday?
    … wait, is that how you got out of 506? I take it back!

    Posted 19 Jul 2006 at 12:24 pm
  4. Anonymous wrote:

    Stat holiday for birthdays *and* finally annexing Turks&Caicos? Well, *I'd* vote for you. šŸ™‚
    Happy (belated?) birthday!

    Posted 19 Jul 2006 at 10:55 pm
  5. Anonymous wrote:

    Hey all,
    Thanks for the birthday wishes, all. Apparently 33 makes it my “Jesus Year” which is also important on some level (time to let the hair grow out and become bearded again, I guess.)
    I had a legitimate reason to get out of 506 but the fact that it was my birthday was a very happy coincidence!
    As for annexing the Turks & Caicos, I actually think we need to go even bigger – let's do some sort of deal with Cuba to make them an official province or territory of Canada. We could add Spanish as a third-official language, swing the country a bit more towards Socialism and piss off the Americans in the process. What's not to love?

    Posted 21 Jul 2006 at 7:33 am

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